I get upset. I don’t say anything.
I’ll do this over and over.
Then something sets me off.
The last straw.
I boil over.
Everyone suffers, including me.
It’s usually over something small.
It’s just one thing too many.
I know it’s bad to bottle up my emotions.
I just don’t want to bother people.
I keep things bottled up. I’ve been doing it for a long time.
It feels good to finally let them out. To let them go.
Some of these stories have been rattling around in my brain for years. Some for decades.
The way I’ve been living my life isn’t working for me.
I’m not talking about being married. Or having kids.
I’m talking about negativity. Self-defeating thoughts. Self-defeating behavior.
It seems like there’s a set of bad choices I keep making over and over.
I’m hoping writing them down will help me define them concretely.
I’m hoping it will help me recognize when I’m thinking about making them again.
I feel like some of those choices have cost me my integrity.
I’m hoping I can get it back.