Quit social media

This video is going to be tl:dw; for a lot of people.  I wonder how much of that is due to social media addiction.  😉

It’s a TED talk by Dr. Cal Newport on the dangers of using social media.

The main points he makes are:

  1. Social media is a slot machine in your phone (or computer).
  2. You don’t need social media to succeed professionally.
  3. There are harms associated with using social media (anxiety, fragmented attention).

Here’s the full talk, for those of you who still have attention spans.

Is there anybody out there?

I deleted my Facebook account a few days ago.

I made a post a few days before I deleted it.  I let people know I was going to do it.  I gave them my blog url and email address.

I haven’t gotten any emails.  Not from friends, anyway.

I don’t know what anyone is doing.

I feel cut off.

…are you still out there?

 

Drowning in a sea of social media

If I’d stayed on task I’d be done by now.

I meant to spend the day packing.  Instead I spent the day on social media sites.

Again.

It’s embarrassing.

It’s frustrating.

I’ll never accomplish anything if I don’t take care of this problem.

I think it’s time to leave social media behind.

Moving

I hate moving.

I started moving stuff as soon as I could.  I didn’t want to be scrambling at the last minute.

Moving my things hasn’t affected my emotions.

A few days ago my wife had my kids start packing, though.

That got to me.

My boys they were oblivious. “Dad, can you tape this box for me?”

It made it real for me.

They’re leaving.

What was it?

Tuesday night I was walking around my neighborhood.  I noticed a light in the sky.  At first I thought maybe it was an airplane behind a cloud.  It didn’t appear to move for several minutes, so I decided it probably wasn’t that.

It was kind of dim and blurry.  I thought maybe it was a galaxy or something.  Then it started to change shape.

It started looking more conical and moving to the south.  I thought maybe it was rocket.  I would expect a rocket to to have a bright orange tail of flame behind it.  This was dim and kind of bluish.

It eventually went behind a cloud and I lost sight of it.

I’ve never seen anything like it before.

Have you?

Bread and Circuses

Ancient Rome.

The Emperors.

Bread and circuses.

Free food and entertainment for all citizens.

Distracting them from society’s problems.

There’s nothing wrong with food.  We need it to live.

There’s nothing wrong with occasional entertainment.

The problem is constant distraction.

From what’s important.

From the slow erosion of our liberties.

We need to be careful.

Otherwise, once it’s obvious what’s wrong,

It will be too late.

Self-Compassion

The Buddhist concept of compassion includes compassion for yourself.

How can someone have compassion for others if they don’t have compassion for themselves?

You’re on a plane.  The oxygen masks drop.

Put yours on first.

This is vital.

Even if you have your children with you.  Your beloved.  Your sick grandmother.

If you pass out while trying to put their oxygen mask on them, who have you helped?

Make sure your needs are being met. Don’t feel guilty about caring for yourself.  How can you help others if you have no energy?

How can you give something you don’t have?

Last week my older son had a bad day at school.

He got into a fight at recess.

Then he kicked a soccer ball.  It hit a teacher in the back.  The teacher yelled at him.

He started crying.

The teacher apologized.

My son said he hated himself.

It spiraled down from there.

He’s such a sweet boy.

If anyone should have self-compassion, it’s him.

“The first transport is away!”

…if you understood that reference, I love you.

I took my first carload of stuff to my mom’s house.

After clearing away A LOT of cobwebs, it doesn’t seem too bad.

She has a working furnace and water heater.

There’s plenty of space to work with.

There’s also PLENTY of work to do.

But I think it can be made livable.

I need to be humbled?

I think of myself as a humble person.

I don’t go around talking about how great I am.

I don’t even think it.

There is one area I need help with:

I don’t ask for help.

I’ll do anything I can think of to avoid it.

When I move I do as much on my own as I can.

I’ll visit forums looking for answers to questions.  If no one has asked the question, I’ll move on.  I don’t want to ask it myself.

Look at all kinds of do-it-yourself books, websites etc.  If a task requires a second person, I’ll lose interest.

I wonder what refusing to ask has cost me.

Divorce?

Separation from my babies?

Moving into a dungeon?

How much worse will things have to get?

Help.

Why do I drink caffeine?

I’ve mentioned before that I’m fat.

I’m guessing at least half of that excess weight came from Mountain Dew.

Partially because I like the way it tastes.

Partially because of the caffeine.

Quitting caffeine sucks.

I hate having a headache all the time.

Being tired all the time is the worst!

Caffeine withdrawal gives me this weird thirst.  I can’t quench it with water.

After the withdrawals are over I feel a lot better, though.

When I drink caffeine habitually I get heartburn.

As well as other digestive issues.

I don’t sleep very well.  I wake up in the middle of the night.  Then I don’t want to go back to sleep.

Drinking caffeine is not the best option for me.

But I have a hard time sticking to any kind of schedule.

Sometimes I get sleep deprived.  I feel like I need something extra.

Just one won’t hurt.

It’s never just one.

Before I know it, it’s become a habit again.